I have been hate and evil and war and death. I have held them in my heart and mind and soul and body, radiating them throughout this blessed universe. I have collected pain, hoarding it to myself until it festered with pus, stinking and rank with dreams of revenge growing from my subconscious until the paths they leave in my soul are worn from use like a well-trodden path in the woods. I have spent my hours, days, years, haunting those paths, all the while yearning for release. My body and my life have been ravaged and crippled by all of this chaos to where I would hardly be recognizable to my Creator. Judging my fellow man in self-righteous ego, I have tried to make up for my non-existent self-esteem by lowering others beneath me. All the while, so blind and deaf and insane I could not see that the only one being judged and lowered was myself as I fed the endless cycle that kept me hating myself, abusing my own spirit. Until the day I awoke.
I had always thought of myself as a loving, responsible person, but when I truly discovered Love and Peace and took ownership of my life and destiny, the blinders fell layer by layer from my being. I saw that the greatest judgement and hate I had reserved for myself. Miserable from the aching, gnawing, empty, gaping hole in my soul, I could not even begin to give love to anyone else. I stopped pitying myself and lamenting my circumstances. I declared an intent to live a year of practiced, intentional gratitude. And bit by miraculous bit my life began to transform.
Just imagine for the sake of argument that there is no such thing in the universe as bad. What if the only thing that makes something bad is mankind’s perception of it? And what if that perception is wrong? The scriptures tell me that God works ALL things together for good. And the longer I live, the more I am able to see that there is always something good that comes of every situation no matter how dark it appears to be. Life is like a giant tapestry and we are each a thread being woven together by the Master Craftsman. We only see from the underside, and from the underside of the tapestry, it looks a mess. The only one that sees the complete picture from the right side is the Creator. Once in a while we may get glimpses, but mostly, we are hanging out underneath, unable to make anything out clearly, concentrating on all the other threads’ frayed ends and mishaps. Some threads are short, with only a few stitches, but they are essential. Others seem hugely important and turn out to be just some background shading. But everyone has a part to play in the total creation. It is far too easy to judge it a mess, but the day will come when we get to see the creation from the right side, and we will be blown away by it’s breathtaking beauty! We will see our own honored places in the whole and will marvel at the importance of some of the most common colors of thread. This is the Master’s masterpiece. And when we can learn to stop worrying about the whole thing, or even what everyone else is doing, we can finally begin to find all those things for which we yearn.
I have learned that the more I love and appreciate God’s creative genius in creating me, the more I can appreciate it in all mankind. I fill myself up with love by being in the presence of love every day. Does that mean four hours on my knees? Maybe it does for some, but God did not put me together that way. I find my best meditation and prayer in the woods or on the beach, walking. That is where I am best able to center myself and open up to my Creator. That is also where I am most likely to hear His Voice. Maybe you commune best while doing dishes, or while dancing, or while interacting with children–where you find your connection is as unique as you are. Sometimes you can only find your quiet in the midst of great noise. Just don’t give up! Keep trying until you find it because nothing else in life will ever be as important or can truly give you joy. Through my connection I have gained so much wisdom about myself. And others.
I am so greatful for the eyes God has opened from inside my soul. Eyes which look with better vision at all the universe’s children, eyes that see as only a Creator can see each member of humanity, every living and created thing. God’s people. My people. Our Beloved. How can I hate? How can I judge? How can I harden my heart to any of these children the Creator has mad in Divine image? How is it that I would harden my arrogant heart and not feel my Master’s heartbreak at the broken, hurting body–created in perfection in God-Mind, yet suffering as in death and war and disease in the famine of their own souls?
I pray to be a light this day. I pray to be Love. Make my lips sound only kindness. Make my heart bestow only love. Make my soul be the peacemaker. May my feet wander where the Lord will lead me to serve all Creation. May my hands and my back labor with all their strength to make a positive difference so that when my day or life is done I will hear my God’s words to me, “Well done, my good and faithful servant.”
- The Face of God Reflected (jodiebethinhercrystalroom.com)
- Crystal-Clear or How I Lost Weight from the Inside-Out (jodiebethinhercrystalroom.com)
- tantrums in the arms of a loving God (motheringspirit.wordpress.com)
- God’s Music Flows (cofchristdailybread.wordpress.com)
- Existence of Living Creator, Universe, and True Salvation for Man (ahmadiyyamuslimtimes.wordpress.com)
- Faith NEVER Dies…. (foodforthespiritualsoul.wordpress.com)
- Living the Lord’s Prayer for Planet Earth (pathwaytoascension.wordpress.com)